So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
