so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Randomize
