My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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