y did u give ur computer a hand job?
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
