i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I am naked and annoyed.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
