Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
