D3 body, D1 cock
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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