He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
