At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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