can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
