Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
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