Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize