All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
