Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
