I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
