why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
