Whats the glycemic index on semen?
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Panties = found
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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