You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
