Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
