So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
