Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
