Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
