evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
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i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
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I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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