He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He has the fingertips of a God
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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