We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize