is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
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