if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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