: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I smell stomach acid.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
