they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
