I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Randomize
