I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
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once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
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Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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