Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
