Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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