Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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