check it out our google latitudes are spooning
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize
