I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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