we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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