I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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