I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
