dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
