Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize