You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Swine flu. Run for my life!
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
