it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Naked Twister starts at high noon
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
