my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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