It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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