I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
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