...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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