First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
