He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
