I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
ttyl tear gas
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
