i just wanna soil my oats bro
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
